Listen Up You Primitive Screwheads: There Is No Wrong Way to Fight Fascism

Editor’s note: one of the reasons that I primarily write essays and at least reasonably well sourced op-eds, as opposed to rants or speeches, is because I like to think of myself more as poorly-funded journalist than just a “blogger.” Is that a pretentious as fuck position? No doubt – but the subtle and entirely personal distinction helps me sleep a little better at night; or rather in the early, crack of dawn hours when my exhaustion level exceeds my “desire to go get coffee” level and I finally collapse into a sobbing heap.

Unfortunately, due to time constraints and my continued inability to properly pay the kind of editor it takes to deal with a bourbon-swilling maniac like myself, I’m finding that I have a lot more things to write about than I have time to properly compose an essay for. Enter the rant, the disputation, the diatribe; a no holds barred onslaught on an issue, idea or remark that probably isn’t worth dropping a four thousand word, well-sourced essay on at that precise moment. Is this the start of a new section here on Who can say; for now I’m just going to label it a rant and see where the vitriol takes us.


So you woke up one day and the sun was shining on your perfectly delightful little world – until you turned on MSNBC. There, to your shock and mortification you saw video tape of vicious, “BernieBro” activists who were also somehow brown-skinned, Mexican anarchist “thugs,” committing acts of “horrific violence” against “completely innocent’ Trump supporters.

Your delicate sensibilities inflamed, you finished your Belgian waffles with fresh fruit breakfast and quickly scurried over to your perfectly delightful little Twitter account to begin castigating those “stupid socialists” for failing to realize their actions would only help to elect Donald Trump; thus denying everyone a chance to see America’s first woman president in action – the goddamn misogynist brutes!

From your tower of privilege, also known as a Manhattan loft with a locked in, three year lease – you solemnly exclaimed that violence is not the answer, that people must respect political protocol and that it was never, under any circumstances okay for a bunch of angry men to surround a woman wearing a “harmless Trump jersey” and pelt her with eggs. Then, feeling supremely confident in your moral superiority, you dutifully spent the next three hours retweeting and shaming anyone who disagreed with your approved, neoliberal branded opinion – before heading out for cocktails with your fabulous, universally privileged friends.

Did I just about get it right, or should I also give you credit for reading and gleefully retweeting that bullshit ode to servile obedience penned by noted shitbag, neoliberal boot-licker Matty Yglesias as well?

Good, now sit down, shut your ignorant fucking piehole and listen up because I have a few goddamn things to explain to you vapid, garbage fucking humans. I’m not going to bother to tell you why you’re wrong and why direct and often violent action has actually been the engine of progress at numerous goddamn points in history because I think you already fucking know that and you’re just pushing a bullshit narrative to make your politics look and feel better. If by some bloody fucking miracle you simply are confused about why violence can be and has been an effective answer to American fascism, I encourage you to stop reading this rant and take a look at this well researched article shared with me on Twitter that should quickly disabuse you of the notion that violence is never the answer.

No, what I’d like to talk to you about instead is the goddamn fucking arrogance, the sheer bloody gall you have to judge the activism and emotional response of disadvantaged kids whose damn lives are literally on the line, from your perfect little life in your perfect little world.

Do you even have a goddamn clue who the kids waving Mexican flags and burning Trump hats in the protest were? I can fucking tell you who they aren’t sunshine; they aren’t undocumented immigrants residing “illegally” in the country because nobody in that situation is dumb enough to purposely get that close to police officers who are likely to arrest them and demand fucking ID. No, those kids weren’t there for themselves – they were there to protest for parents, aunts, friends and valued members of their communities who face brutal, life-threatening deportation back to what is essentially a goddamn failed state; every single fucking day and on a moment’s notice.

Can you fucking imagine, what you would do if that was your mother they were talking about deporting and building a wall to keep out? I would fucking burn police cars you piece of shit, and even if you can’t accept that right now – so would you. Have you ever even stopped to think about why those protestors are chanting Bernie’s name and not Hillary’s? Have you even considered the possibility that it doesn’t fucking matter to them who wins in an election between Clinton and Trump? That electing either will continue to put their families in constant, immeasurable danger for another four years?

Of fucking course not, because you don’t give a flying fuck about young Mexican/Hispanic American kids trying to carve out an existence in the face of constant repression by federal authorities. You don’t give a shit about the devastating effect losing one’s support network to a deportation order can have on a young man’s life and his ability to stay in school or raise a family. Your entire purpose in commenting is to support a particular political viewpoint built around half-measures and demanding that everyone wait their goddamn turn for the tiny drips of assistance neoliberal policies dole out to the obedient.

Sit the fuck back down, I’m not done.

Is Donald Trump a fascist or are we just playing fucking games? Is he really capable of getting the United States into a nuclear war at any given moment or was that a neoliberal lie too? How the fuck can you people seriously tell us that Trump is an existential fucking threat to our existence as a nation, a point I strongly concur with frankly – and then poo-poo when people decide enough is fucking enough? Why is it that when it favors your chosen, frankly disgusting and criminal candidate this is more than an election, but when people who’s lives will literally be destroyed by Trump decide to take extraordinary measures to protest his candidacy it’s time to “respect the political process” and chant kum-ba-fucking-ya for change? Hello dipshit, earth to fucking airhead – Trump supporters are VOTING for violence!

So some selfish, obnoxious fucking white lady with enough money for a custom Trump in 16 football jersey got pelted with eggs until she cried after flaunting her power and privilege in society by openly taunting the crowd of protestors that had her surrounded; why the hell should anyone care? So fucking what if someone burned a hat? A guy got punched and went down like a sack of potatoes you say? I’m sure he’ll be alright when he gets back to his nice house and his family that isn’t going to be sent to their fucking deaths by the federal government anytime soon. What about the guy who was cut after getting clocked in the head with a bag of rocks? Hey mutherfucker nobody wept for the supporters of King Louis either and you’re on the wrong side of history, morality and basic human fucking decency here, so don’t expect a get well card.

Actually, I have another extremely important fucking question for you; when Trump supporters were cold cocking people in the face in the middle of fascist Trump rallies and you were tweeting about the need for civil discourse, do you think it actually helped one single fucking victim of violence by Fuckface von Clownstick’s minions? Are you even fucking aware that a week before all this shit went down, fascist Trump-loving pinheads were fucking pepper spraying peaceful protestors right in the face?! Does that look like it tickles to you? Have you considered the goddamn possibility that the protestors might have had enough? Of fucking course not; like I said before you only give a shit about yourself, your politics and your potential to benefit from this election.

Would I have thrown a punch in the face of obnoxious, taunting white people who’d openly declared their support for deporting members of my family? How the fuck should I know?! I haven’t walked a mile in those fucking kid’s shoes and neither have you, ya pathetic sycophant son of a bitch. Your idea of a bad fucking day is when the Uber driver is ten minutes late and they spelled your name wrong on your triple-mocca latte this morning, so shut the fuck up!

You wanna know what’s helping fascism, how all this helps Trump win? It’s when all you fucking Vassar girls and Harvard boys use your massive platforms to judge the activism and outrage of others while pretending you give a fucking shit about them so long as your house is clean and your lawn is manicured. Fuck you; you goddamn sniveling collaborators are the ones helping Trump win – not angry Mexican American kids who’re sick of being sold a bullshit line and a raw deal by people who want to tear their fucking lives apart.

Here’s the score sweetheart, the poor, the oppressed and the forgotten minorities of America are just as fucking sick of the hollow, neoliberal version of multiculturalism as they are of supply-side economic lunacy and open racism by the GOP. The jig is fucking up, the common man and especially the common woman have learned that they will never be equals at your table and that all your calls to identity politics are meaningless because only your high-profile, also affluent minority friends will be allowed to fucking “lean in” and share power.

Everyone now knows that you’re also racist, sexist, bigoted and most importantly classist opportunists who don’t give a shit about the real issues facing the multitude of oppressed people in the country today.

This is just a beginning, just as Black Lives Matter was a beginning and the Occupy movement before that. You can fool most of the people, some of the time but as far back as the WTO protests in Seattle, there has been a growing contingent of politically active people in the country who no longer believe any of your lies. You can’t put that back in the box by policing the activism of each oppressed group of Americans one at a time; although it’s been fascinating to watch the neoliberal media machine attempt to do just that, I must admit.

The show is over, the magic trick failed and if the wealthy elites in our society are not prepared to offer both a more equitable economic arrangement for the sharing of wealth and more, real political power to oppressed, disadvantaged people in the USA – then I am afraid you will have a full blown insurgency on your hand and no right to cry foul when that insurgency moves beyond what you consider “legitimate political discourse.”

Don’t cry to me sunshine, I’m not the one who’s gonna put a knife to your throat if you elite “thinkfluencers” don’t stop shuffling for power real soon; I’m just the ghost of Jacob Marley, rattling chains and trying to warn you one last time that a goddamn storm is indeed coming. Repent and show some solidarity – history doesn’t reflect kindly on those who stood in the doorway when the final score is recounted.


  • Nina Illingworth



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